PLAYER 1 - Tyranthraxus

    

        


        
        


        
        


        
        

            

                
Ice

                by Matthew
                James Brooks

                

                I walk on water in
                the winter

                like a Part-Time Jesus

                with nothing to preach

                except pity for the world

                and sorrow, sorrow, sorrow

                for those to follow.

                Beneath me, the crystalline water

                blows notes on a broken bottle

                playing the sad, sad song

                of Nature's misery.

                
                

                
Fire and Ice

                by Robert
                Frost

                

                Some say the world
                will end in fire,

                Some say in ice. 

                From what I've tasted of desire 

                I hold with those who favor fire. 

                But if it had to perish twice, 

                I think I know enough of hate 

                To say that for destruction ice 

                Is also great 

                And would suffice.
            
        
        
For
        many years our "cousins" on this world have
        made trouble for us in Trigolde and our
        brothers in Keina. But now
        they have gone too far! It's not enough they have this
        strange sect- now they have planes to conquer the world
        and disseminate their heathen beliefs.
        
I, Lord Tyranthraxus of
Trigolde and
Lord Alodar
        the Apprentice of Keina have
        together decided that this can't be allowed to continue.
        Together we will stop our barbarian cousins and once
        again reinstate the true faith in Fradle and
Röle, which are
        the haunts of sin.
        

        
But
        now their dark forces have spread even our own regions.
A spy! in
        the palace!! How could he betray his
        Lord and his family for this this ... God!?!? He will pay
        dearly for his traitor. But he managed to expose our
        magnificent plane to the unfaithful so we must start our
        planes now without the preparation we need.
        
Our brave scouts have sent message
        that our enemy became scared when they heard about theirs
        rishes our plans and started attacked neighbour to take
        theirs wealth 
        
 Are they completely
lost?
        
        
Evan theirs Holy
Book tells them
        that they should let the weak people live in peace. How
        are these weak people going to be able to defend
        themselves? Even against Fradle's and
Röle's
        undisciplined and poor armed troops they've no chance.
        This news has spread like a wildfire across the world. To
        be able to defend their self our neighbours asked us to
        help them,
        
How can we say no?
        
This will decrease our resource
        substantially for an attack against renegades, is it
        impossible for two such just men as me and Alodar the
        Apprentice to say no.
        

        
Already
        are parts of our proud army on the way to help our
        neighbour to build their defence. With our superior arms
        and tactics, the unfaithful will have no chance. With our
        wealth's we will build armies more powerful than ever
        beheld before, and our great magicians will research new
        great spells.
        
Together will Lord Alodar
        the Apprentice of Keina and
I, Lord
        Tyranthraxus of Trigolde, crush the
        progeny of the dark in Fradle and
Röle.
        

            

                

                
            
            

                
Lord
                Tyranthraxus
                

                    

                        
Wizard
                        of Trigolde
                        
                    
                
                
            
        
        


        

        Welcome to Lord Tyranthraxus of
Trigolde

        
        
    

Contact Tyranthraxus at gor@hem.passagen.se

PLAYER 2 - Greyhawk

Greyhawk looked around in beaming approval.  Everything was going so
well! The hall was magnificent; the food smelled superb; the marriage
ceremony had gone off without a hitch.

There was a tug on his arm.  He turned to face the irritated visage of
his chief advisor and sage, Patrias.  Surely even Patrias could find
SOMETHING pleasant to say on this of all days.....the day of peace
between all the iceland realms.  Greyhawk tried another smile,
expectantly.

"Stop grinning like a vacant halfwit" hissed Patrias.  "They already
suspect you're a complete moron; why must you continually insist on
proving them right?"

The smile quivered and died away.  "You really are the grumpiest man I
have ever had the misfortune to meet, Patrias.  Why can't you enter into
the spirit of it all?"

"Bah!!" said Patrias.  "I'll be happy when the first child is born and
not before!  That is what consumates the treaty; not all this
........crap" he said, rolling the word off his tongue with relish. 
"Only then will I cease worrying that you will manage to think of some
new and ingenious method to ruin five years of negotiation."

"What are you talking about" said Greyhawk, slightly miffed.  "If it
wasn't for me, there wouldn't be any peace.  After all, I couldn't see
the Trigolde princess wanting to marry an old fart like you".  Greyhawk
paused for a moment to laugh at his own cleverness. 
 
Patrias rolled his eyes.   "Whatever my lord.  Doubtless you make a fine
show-pony.  Just do your job and get her pregnant."

"Oh....no problem with that, my friend...no problem at all. 
And....speaking of my lovely bride, here she is.  Darling!   Darling!! 
Come here, my dear.....I have a new magic trick to show you..."

Patrias blinked to attention.  "Magic trick?  What trick?  You didn't
mention anything to me about any magic!"

Greyhawk beamed contentedly "It's no problem Patrias!  I did ALL the
homework you set me.  Any child could do it."

"But you're not a child!" said Patrias acidly.  "You're far worse than
that."

"Oh come on...it'll be fine.

The fair Valona, princess of Trigolde and now the new Queen of Fralde,
approached Greyhawk and Patrias, trailing a retinue of admirers and
hangers-on.  About as empty headed as Greyhawk, in Patrias' opinion, she
was undeniably incredibly beautiful.  The apple of her fathers eye, the
marriage between her and Greyhawk and consequent expected production of
children from both houses, was the key to the negotiated settlement of
over 200 years of inter-racial conflict.

"What is it, my honey-bundle" she said sweetly.  Greyhawk smiled back,
completely infatuated.

"My little lambkins.....my beautiful sweet-cheeks....I have a little
treatie-poo for you...."

"Oh pooooo!  I've had enough of treaties!  Can't anyone talk about
anything other than treaties and killing people and stuff?"

Greyhawk looked hurt momentarily, then caught her meaning.  "Oh no,
sweet-cheeks!  Not "treaties".  A "treat"!  I have some magic!  A new
spell - Patrias here just taught it to me"

"Don't blame me!" said Patrias, thoroughly alarmed.  "I was made to do
it against my better judgement!".  'Still', he thought, 'I've only
taught him a few cantrips.  Just how much harm can he do?'

"This is a flying spell".  

Gasps of admiration spread through the crowd, Valona gasped excitedly
and clapped her hands in approval.  "I'll be just like the little
birdies" she gushed.  

Patrias stiffened in puzzled unease.  He inclined his head to Greyhawk's
ear.  "My lord......my lord.......I don't recall
actually...ermmm.....teaching you that spell.  Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure Patrias.  And you did teach me...it was in the
homework reading last week" said Greyhawk brightly.  "OK....here we go".

Greyhawk began gesturing wildly and chanting sonorously, focusing his
gaze on Valona.  A few feet away Patrias wracked his brains
feverishly.....a flying spell?  Where on earth could Greyhawk have seen
a flying spell?  The only reading he had prescribed was..............

Greyhawk reached the climax of his spell.  His arm shot out.  His finger
pointed straight at Valona.  The crowd held its breath.  A yellow beam
extended from Greyhawk's finger to Valona's impressive bosom.

"HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!" shouted Patrias.

Valona turned a lovely shade of golden brown.  Her clothes went black
and fell off.  Her body thumped to the ballroom floor, steaming
slightly.

Greyhawk looked a picture of incomprehension.  "But I did it all
right...even though that was my first time.  I wanted to keep it as a
surprise for sweet-cheeks..."

Patrias sank to his knees, appalled beyond conscious thought.  With an
effort he roused himself to speak.

"You.....you.....you........MORON!!!!!!!!  That wasn't a FLYING spell
you learned last week"  He slapped his forehead.  "You always did have
trouble telling your l's from your r's!!"

One of the Trigolde and Kelna ambassadors stepped forward, an expression
of faint concern evident.  "My Lord Greyhawk...we are enjoying the magic
of course, but tell me.....at what stage does the Princess Valona start
flying?  And.....at what stage does she cease to look like....that?  Was
that strictly necessary for the spell?"

Greyhawk considered the man; a noted former gneral in Trigolde's army
and even now twice Greyhawk's size and impressively muscled.  A bead of
sweat formed on Greyhawk's nose, dripping conspicuously to the ballroom
floor.

"Well......ahh...........I........it appears that there may have
been....ahem......a sort of, well, MISTAKE."

The general looked once in incredulous disgust at Greyhawk, once at
Princess Valona, medium rare, and erupted into a blur of action, arms
and legs pumping furiously as he headed straight for Greyhawk with a
speed that Greyhawk would not have given him credit for.

"Eeek!" said Greyhawk.  "Save me!"

"RAAAAARRRRGGGHHHH!!!"  said the general, not slowing down in the
slightest.

The entire hall erupted into a frenzy as Trigolde and Kelna guests
screamed, fought, yelled, cursed, threw things or did nothing as the
mood took them, generally speaking a mixture of all of the above.  it
took close on half an hour before Greyhawk's fifty icelander militia
could bring things under control.

"WELL, FOOL" snarled the Trigolde ambassador with withering contempt. 
"Have you got anything to say for yourself before we return to our
masters and tell them that your living entrails deserve to be staked out
over an anthill?"

"Ermmmmm......umm......well.....I don't suppose you have any MORE
princesses you could spare" said Greyhawk hopefully, holding a
protective hand over his broken nose.  "Just one would do....I PROMISE
I'd be more careful this time...."

The enraged ambassador tried once more to reach Greyhawk, but was held
back by several guards.  Spitting and swearing, he was unceremoniously
dumped outside, followed by the remainder of the Trigolde and Kelna
guests.

"Oh dear" said Greyhawk.  "He wasn't very happy with me, I'm afraid."

He turned to Patrias.  "I need your advice, I think.  I'm concerned that
what just happened may not be well received back in Trigolde."

Patrias stared at Greyhawk alternating between a glassy-eyed expression
of helpless frustration and black hatred.  Greyhawk continued on
obliviously.

"Do you think the war is still cancelled?"

Contact Greyhawk at ivanmc@xtra.co.nz

PLAYER 3 - Belgarath

No Blurb Submitted As Yet.

Contact Belgarath at AnninBen@earthlink.net

PLAYER 4 - Alodar the Apprentice

[*sigh* Here I go again it seems... And this time I have an even stronger
 feeling of deja vu than usual - which IS unusual, since being stuck in an
 endless loop of 'clone self' spells makes deja vu feel like an almost normal
 experience like grooming one's tail - HEY!! I am not supposed to have a tail,
 am I ?? Better check at once - what a relief, I don't... But where DID that
 thought come from - this world seems strange indeed, and still quite familiar
 in an odd sort of way...]

-Pardon me, sir, but are you Alodar the Apprentice?
-Yes, I am! (Or at least a clone of a clone of his clone...)
-Excellent - I have urgent news from wizard Tyranthraxus!
-Tyrannosaurus?? This deja vu feeling gets eerier and eerier - I have heard
 that name before, and it was NOT related to prehistoric earth if I (or my
 previous clone?) remember correctly...
-Pardon me, sir?? I didn't understand half of what you were saying, but
 wizard Tyranthraxus would like to meet you for an urgent discussion!
-Ah, a wizard! So at least this is not a world without magic, then?
-No sir, but please come with me sir, we have an emergency here, and wizard
 Tyranthraxus needs to talk to you immediately!

[OK, I'd better get an urgent update of this world ASAP anyway, or my deja vu
 feeling is going to drive me nuts with curiosity... Hah, as if I weren't nuts
 enough already - being the n:th clone of the nuttiest wizard ever to live on
 my homeworld *grumble*]

-Hi Alodar, nice to meet you again! Fate has once again brought us together
 on this island to save this world from the heathens of the north!
-Nice to meet you, Tyrantraxix, but I am a little confused... You say we have
 met earlier on this world, and your name (your appearance, as well as the
 appearance of this whole world) seems eerily familiar, like a deja vu feeling
 squared, but I still don't remember any details... ?! Presumably you didn't
 meet me, but another of my clones [triply squared cursed be the original
 Alodar for not being able to keep his fingers away from the 'clone self' spell
 *growl*] so could you please fill me in on this world's situation - and the
 dealings with the other Alodar ASAP!
-ASAP?
-Sorry, Tyrannofix, that means the same as 'on the double'...
-On the double??
[Grmph... Wizards stuck on only one world are sometimes so... limited in their
 vocabulary...]
-Immediately, at once, NOW, Thorax!
-The name is TYRANTHRAXUS, Alodar! Try to remember that! OK, listen here...
 We are having trouble with our superstitious neighbours in the north, the
 people of Fralde and Röle, and now they are amassing forces against us, led by
 two skillful mages - too bad they too succumbed to the strange superstitions
 of the northern folks! Us being peaceful traders, we'd much rather trade goods
 than Gods with them, but as long as they hold on to their strange beliefs
 this island is definitely not big enough for all four of us. And the worst
 thing is, we just recently discovered they have had a spy in our palace for
 quite some time... Fortunately, I learned a mind reading spell when I was an
 exchange student on a strange world called Loreana or something, so once he
 was brought before me for interrogation I was able to find out quite a lot
 about their plans - and I didn't even have to apply physical 'persuasion'
 to make him reveal all what he thought. *Sigh* Well, all spells have their
 drawbacks - if they're too easy they ain't even fun to use... But for a
 starter, they intend to....

[Three hours later]

-Thank you for the briefing, Thor... er, Tyranthraxus! I do have a certain
 difficulty remembering names - after all, me and my clones have been on so
 many worlds that we hardly even remember the names of the worlds! So, no
 offence intended, Thor... Trax... er, ahem, no offence intended, pal!
 OK let's go to work then - thanks to your briefing I now remember much more
 of this world, and the deja vu feeling is back to almost normal levels again!
-Good bye for now, Alodar, and good luck!
[A clone of a clone of a clone with a memory problem? Hmm, this new version
 seems even crazier than the previous one - but he WAS a quite competent
 wizard despite his strange appearance and even stranger manners... After all,
 we did save the world! Hey WAIT - if we did save the world, what are we doing
 here AGAIN? And now when I think of it - didn't we defend the religious faith
 from the heathens of the south then?? So did we help the wrong side the last
 time, and now have to set it right, or what? Darn - now his craziness begins
 to infect me too... I'd better stop thinking and start spelling again, that is
 defiantly more benefacial to my mentol helth - and I do need to brush up on
 some of my spelling anyway, it seems...]
-God bye pal! And don't you worry, we'll save this world - also! BTW do you
 think the teleport spell from my homeworld works here too, I'm sort of in a..
-Alodar, NOO! [Arrghh, too late, last time he landed in a latrine heap! Wonder
 where he'll end up now...]
-... hurry to get started ***WHOOSH***

[*thud*]

-Hey it WORKS! I seem to have landed exactly in my study chair in my study
 chamber in the magic college of Kelna... Wow, it even has my name engraved on
 a plate - that is really a kind gesture from the staff - what does it say...
 "Greyhawk - the greytest wizard in the world" - HOLY COW! (Or unholy cow, I
 should probably say, given the fact that we southerners don't believe in that
 religious holiness gibberish...) I am in the right place but in the wrong city
 - grr... OK, I'd better try to get out of here without being noticed - better
 use the 'sneaky teleport' spell this time ***KA-BLAM! BOOM!! CRASH!!!***

['Sneaky teleport' - my... ahem, tail! So much for homeworld magic on foreign
 worlds! Wait, what did I say? My TAIL?? {looking anxiously} Very definitely
 *UN*HOLY COW!!! How on earth (ahem, Shrelna) did I grow a tail?? These worlds
 are getting more and more surreal with each and every cloning... Whoever has
 heard of an icelander mage with a tail before *grumble* Oh, HOLY SH*T FROM A
 HOLY COW!!! I should never use spells without putting my glasses on first - it
 seems I didn't use a 'sneaky teleport' spell but 'sneak a tail through the
 port' spell! And they don't even have customs on this world *sob*]

{42 minutes of elaborate - OK, to be perfectly honest with you, some of it not
 quite so elegant and elaborated as it should be - cursing and swearing later}

-Ahh, here is the library - looks tailormade for my needs, except *OUCH!* I
 must remember to close the door AFTER I have pulled my tail through... But
 apart from that, having a tail doesn't seem too bad - it helps me keep the
 balance, and on occasion it seems almost practical - I can scratch my head
 without taking my hands off the book.. Surreal realms - or surrealms *chuckle*
 aren't totally bad all the time, I daresay! Now where do I start - well, this
 title looks promising:
 "A Short Introduction to the Foundations of Magick in the Lands of Shrelna".
 Good! I like them short and snappy - wait, what says the fine print...
 "Volume I - to eventually end with Volume LIX"...

[*sigh* Well, I'd better get started then - now where did I put my glasses...
 Hey wait! There is something strange with my deja vu feeling again - shouldn't
 it end with another volume?? ... No, even with my glasses on this definitely
 ends with Volume LIX, so I figure it must be the correct ending for this
 world...]

Contact Alodar the Apprentice at rwikman@ra.abo.fi

Off to WOW Game Status Page.